My Favorite Wedding Stereotypes

With the wedding season in full swing and plenty of friends tying the knot, I dedicate this one to all the wedding stereotypes. After attending nine weddings in the 2013 Indian wedding season, I have come to realize that every wedding has many of these stereotypes, all of whom add character to the festivities.  The first and most essential one: the “Bridezillas”. Being self-involved (and rightly so), throwing tantrums, carelessly tossing jewellery and other wedding essentials around, and generally making the most of being the center of attention, are the most common traits of a bridezilla. The bridezilla is the epitome of contradictions. She is moody, emotional and brattish, yet is oddly elegant, unnaturally polite and affectedly coy. The next stereotype is yet another classic: the “in denial grooms”. They, as their name suggests, live in absolute denial that they are getting married and their lives are about to change. Their traits include being eerily calm, enjoying wedding proceedings and ceremonies, and putting up with the contradictory nature of said bridezillas. The third and most interesting of the stereotypes: “know it all aunties”. These “aunties” know everybody and everything. They bring impressive accomplishments - knowledge and experience- gained from attending over 50 weddings in a single wedding season. They know the season’s fashion, food, and  fiascos. Their defining characteristic is their strong opinion about all things wedding-related: the bride, the groom, the décor, the clothes, the ceremonies,the food, the relatives, etc. Oh! And they are easy to spot because they tout their expert opinions to anyone who will lend half a listening ear. The other small-timer sterotypes include the “dressed to be the bride” and the “foodie”. These need little explanation. You’ll find the first trying to outshine the bride and the second hovering by the buffet. While all stereotypes add layers of complexity to an already elaborate affair, mistake none to be trouble makers. They are all essential in their own way for they bring much humor and entertainment to the weddings. After all, a wedding without these characters would be dull as dishwate, or in the words of the “know it all” aunty I recently met, “bland as the beige saree the bride wore.”

Do you have any favorite wedding stereotypes? Maybe the relative who is trying to get you engaged to their neighbor’s son or daughter? Perhaps the high-school boy who gawks shamelessly at the bridesmaids? Or maybe the groomsman who unabashedly ogles at the scrawny teenage girl dressed in something that might be deemed appropriate only for a dip in the pool ….?